Monday, May 31, 2010

Women, Food, and God: The Prologue & Chapter One

Prologue...check.  Chapter One...check.  I just finished the first chapter of Women, Food, and God.  I actually wanted to keep reading, but I knew that I had to go ahead and write about what I've read in order to fully process everything. 

So far, the book has been an easy read.  Geneen Roth seems like a casual, insightful, and relatable person.  Not just because she curses in the prologue...but because I can really relate to her views about God.  I can relate to her periods of question...but knowledge that something is truly out there that is bigger than us.  So, I like her...and I think that is somewhat important when reading a book.  I have struggled to get through A New Earth and The Power of Now, and it may just be that Eckhart Tolle does not seem casual and relatable (he definitely seems insightful).  Anyway, I am looking forward to hearing what Ms. Roth has to say in her book.

At first, the prologue had me a little skeptical.  She writes about all of these women with these major issues in their lives or from their childhoods.  As I read, I kept thinking, I don't have that excuse...I did not grow up with fighting parents...or feeling ugly...or even issues with my weight.  I was having a hard time relating to how my life and my history related to how and what I eat. 

But then she wrote about paying attention.  Paying attention to how you behave when you don't get what you want or things don't go your way.  She said that I need to pay attention to what I value, how and on what I spend my time, my money...and of course, how I eat.  This paragraph made me think.  I don't know what it made me think...but it made me think.  It made me think that she may be on to something.  All of those things mentioned are things that I have issue with in my life.  What do I value?  What is truly important?  Clothes and material things?  People?  Why do I feel the need to always be right?  Why do I feel heat rising internally when I don't get my way or when things go wrong?  Why do I feel such despair?  Why do I spend, when I know that I desperately need to save?  And why am I drawn to foods that I know will not make me feel good in the long run?  Why do I feel that I need to satiate my cravings or I will not be unhappy or I will be unsatisfied in life?  Though I don't know what all this means for me and food, I do know that it made me think.  Which is good.

It also got me thinking about my huge fear of losing people in my life...specifically my mother and my fiance.  I know that my anxiety over death is because I lost my father at seventeen.  And though, I think that I mourned appropriately, I think that I have this unnatural fear and/or anxiety about losing the people that I love most. Anyway, I don't know what that means either or how it connects to anything, but I do think that it is important to get it out and think about it.  So, I am.

Okay, off to read chapter two.  I'll report back later.


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