I feel like since I've been "back," each week, I log in to report my major setbacks, my minimal successes...AND any changes that I plan to make for the following week.
So, let's just get to it.
FAIL: Damian and I ate out on Thursday-Saturday...AND I went a little crazy with the mac and cheese during our multicultural feast at school.
PROGRESS: Though some might call this failure...I am proud that we have gone from eating out seven nights a week to three nights a week (Go, us!!!)...and I mean, it's mac and cheese. No one can say no to mac and cheese.
CHANGES FOR NEXT WEEK: We have an off-site work thing at a bar on Thursday, and my cousin is coming into town from Texas for the weekend...so, I am feeling like I may be eating out once or twice. BUT once or twice is it! My goal is to eat at home at least 5 nights per week.
FAIL: I did not wake up early one time this whole week to do my morning workout.
PROGRESS: Though I didn't do it in the morning, I DID squeeze in workouts after school two or three days this week!!
CHANGES FOR NEXT WEEK: Morning workouts are out...AGAIN. Other than yoga, I just can't fathom squeezing into my sports bra and jumping on the treadmill in the AM. This week's workout goals are as follows:
Sunday: Cardio and Strength (lower)-check!
Monday: Cardio and Yoga
Tuesday: REST
Wednesday: Cardio and Strength (upper)
Thursday: REST
Friday: Hot Yoga (trying to go with a friend from work...this is not set in stone)
Saturday: Cardio
I've changed my dissertation schedule so that it will allow me to workout after school. Tuesday and Thursdays are my late days at work (Damian picks me up at 6ish...that's a an 11 hour day, people!!!)...and not so surprisingly, I NEVER want to workout on these days. I also realize that these are the days that I ALWAYS want to eat out. Stress makes me want a glass of wine and someone who will prepare, bring me, and clean up my dinner. Some thing that I have being trying to be better about...Stress is so evil!
FAIL: I did not track any calories all week (kinda cause I had decided not to).
PROGRESS: I started back on Sparkpeople again today...hopefully it will be relatively painless and not so time consuming.
CHANGES FOR NEXT WEEK: I keep going back and forth about tracking, but I think the type A in me is craving the extra accountability. I'm not making any real commitments...but I'm going to try to track for this whole week. We'll see...
FAIL: No strength training all week:(
PROGRESS: I finally did Cathe Friedrich's pyramid lower body workout TODAY!
CHANGES FOR NEXT WEEK: The workout today was awesome...and it made me feel strong! Not a huge fan of lower body, but it was still cool. I'm really excited about upper body on Wednesday.
FAIL: I gave in to mindless snacking once or twice...or maybe more like three or four.
PROGRESS: Though I snacked a bit, I did follow my meal plan almost all week (obviously Thursday-Saturday, things went a little awry...)
CHANGES FOR NEXT WEEK: No real changes here...going to keep doing what I've been doing. Eating lunch when the kids go to the cafeteria (at 10am) has definitely helped me not get so hungry in the afternoon. I'm going to continue to eat every two to three hours this week. The key is never to let yourself get too hungry.
So, as a whole, I wasn't perfect (but, who is, really!?!?). I am super proud of the baby steps that I did take this week. And I know I'm headed in the right direction. Hopefully, I will have even more progress and even less failure next week!!!!!
Showing posts with label goals. Show all posts
Showing posts with label goals. Show all posts
Sunday, October 2, 2011
Sunday, September 18, 2011
It's a process...
My last post was sad and defeating. Since then, I have been on a downward spiral. I think that I can honestly say that I have eaten out or food from a restaurant every day since the last week in June. No lie. This habit has been expensive and has been detrimental to my waistline.
I don't know how it all started. Last April, I decided to give up alcohol, sugar, and desserts for Lent. It resulted in about a ten pound weight loss in about eight weeks or so. So, the end of the school year came and it was supposed to be Operation Yoga. I had bought all these Living Social and Groupon coupons...I was off from teaching...I was running...I was so ready to hit this workout thing hard.
Then, I went into dissertation hibernation. Four or so weeks of getting up...reading...writing...get up...read...write...get up...you get the point. Absolutely miserable. It sucked the life out of me. I wanted to spend my summer in downward dog and here I was sitting on my couch being miserable. But in the end, I turned in my chapter (I was trying to get three done...but one was all I could muster up).
And then there was the honeymoon. Seven days of drinking and eating and drinking and eating and drinking and...again, you get the point.
Coming back off of that I was ALL downhill. The Border, A.J.'s, Great Wall, Red Lobster, Mazzy's...repeat. If it was bad for me...I'd order it. It went against everything that I have been trying to do for the past two or three years.
One good thing that happened in this time is that I quit smoking...for good. At times, I would blame my bottomless appetite on this. But after awhile, I couldn't blame my gluttony on my lack of cigarettes.
The ten pounds came back slowly...especially considering how much I was eating. I am officially back to where I was last April. Each Monday that came, I literally said that I was starting over. I was THAT girl. The "I'm Starting on Monday" girl...how cliche is that?!?!
But Monday would come and by Tuesday, I would be sitting across from my husband looking at a waitress and ordering a glass of Reisling with something fried.
Part of the problem is that I had a really stressful start to the school year. The beginning of the year is always hard, but this has been unprecedented.
Another problem (or at least I think it is a problem) is that I have trying to go against personality type. I've been trying to take a more laid back approach. I was still planning out meal, but I didn't want to count calories or step on the scale every week. I wanted to be more balanced.
When I stepped into the fitting room at the Gap last weekend, I realized balanced hasn't been working for me. I am Type A...and my Type A personality has helped me be successful in weight loss in the past...so I decided today that it was time to look at the things that made me successful in the past and bring them back.
1. Tracking calories. First it was selfdietclub.com...then it was sparkpeople.com. I don't know what it is, but counting calories works for me. It's super time consuming and I would annoyingly track EVERYTHING that I put in my mouth, but it did work.
2. Planning my meals. I never stopped planning my meals...even over the past three months of eating out. I just didn't follow the meal plan. It ended up with lots of wasted food (and more money down the drain). I've gotten better at preparing meals on Sunday and packing lunch each day...I just need to get better at making dinner in the evening. That seems to be where I'm going wrong.
3. Exercise. This has been the thing that I have beat myself up most about. In the past three months, I have probably worked out maybe ten times. It makes me feel really bad...especially when I remember how good exercise makes me feel. A co-worker now goes to hot yoga all the time...without me. And one of my friends just started running and has been doing a whole bunch of 5Ks...without me. The co-workers that I used to work out with after school have started working out again...without me. I need to start moving. I've been making a workout schedule for the past couple of weeks...I just haven't been following it...kind of like the food thing. Anyway, I need to work out and I need to track my workouts.
4. Guidelines. I work better with guidelines. No whites...no caffeine...no desserts. I need guidelines to follow to keep me on track. Last Sunday, I told myself that I would eat none of the above things on Sundays through Thursdays...I had a drink in my hand and nachos in my belly by Wednesday night. This is week two of guidelines...actually, I guess I should just call it week one...
5. Weigh ins. I have a love/hate relationship with weigh ins. I'm a weekly weigh in girl...I like to see my progress on a graph or a chart. I like to see that what I have been doing shows on the scale. BUT with that said, that last weigh in REALLY got me off track...and it has been damn near impossible to get back on track again. I am still undecided about weigh ins...but I do know they have worked in the past.
6. All things blogs. That includes blogging and bloggers. I pretty much quit blogging and following all of my healthy living blogs cold turkey after that last weigh in. I would check in on a couple of my favorites every now and then, but for the most part, I didn't think there was any reason to read them because I wasn't living that life style. It just made me sad. Why do I want to read about someone running 5 miles after work while my fat ass is sitting on the couch. But as I've written before, I think that it is somewhat inspirational...it's the if "they" can do it I can do it kinda thing. I might do a little blog stalking this week to help get me motivated.
And that's about it. Those have been the six things that have helped me lose weight in the past. And honestly, in the past, it wasn't all about losing weight...it was about living healthy. Maybe that's where I've gone wrong. Since my focus has been on losing weight...I feel panicked and overwhelmed by it. As oppose to healthy living, that just something that is. You did it for yourself...for your body...for motivation...and for confidence (and so that you can fit into your clothes). So, with that being said, I've decided to leave out number 5...no weigh ins. Not weekly at least. I'll weigh myself tomorrow...and then I'll weigh myself again in a month.
Writing this has helped me feel a little motivated. It's cathartic in a way. Admitting my dirty little dining out secret...and realizing that stress has brought a lot of this on. AND realizing that I have only been off of the wagon for three months (Its felt like a lifetime). Anyway, I have felt like I have become closer to being back on track in the past couple of weeks. I need to remember that this whole thing is a process...
Welcome back to my calorie-counting, exercising, healthy living, blog following, meal planning, conscious living self...you've been missed:)
I don't know how it all started. Last April, I decided to give up alcohol, sugar, and desserts for Lent. It resulted in about a ten pound weight loss in about eight weeks or so. So, the end of the school year came and it was supposed to be Operation Yoga. I had bought all these Living Social and Groupon coupons...I was off from teaching...I was running...I was so ready to hit this workout thing hard.
Then, I went into dissertation hibernation. Four or so weeks of getting up...reading...writing...get up...read...write...get up...you get the point. Absolutely miserable. It sucked the life out of me. I wanted to spend my summer in downward dog and here I was sitting on my couch being miserable. But in the end, I turned in my chapter (I was trying to get three done...but one was all I could muster up).
And then there was the honeymoon. Seven days of drinking and eating and drinking and eating and drinking and...again, you get the point.
Coming back off of that I was ALL downhill. The Border, A.J.'s, Great Wall, Red Lobster, Mazzy's...repeat. If it was bad for me...I'd order it. It went against everything that I have been trying to do for the past two or three years.
One good thing that happened in this time is that I quit smoking...for good. At times, I would blame my bottomless appetite on this. But after awhile, I couldn't blame my gluttony on my lack of cigarettes.
The ten pounds came back slowly...especially considering how much I was eating. I am officially back to where I was last April. Each Monday that came, I literally said that I was starting over. I was THAT girl. The "I'm Starting on Monday" girl...how cliche is that?!?!
But Monday would come and by Tuesday, I would be sitting across from my husband looking at a waitress and ordering a glass of Reisling with something fried.
Part of the problem is that I had a really stressful start to the school year. The beginning of the year is always hard, but this has been unprecedented.
Another problem (or at least I think it is a problem) is that I have trying to go against personality type. I've been trying to take a more laid back approach. I was still planning out meal, but I didn't want to count calories or step on the scale every week. I wanted to be more balanced.
When I stepped into the fitting room at the Gap last weekend, I realized balanced hasn't been working for me. I am Type A...and my Type A personality has helped me be successful in weight loss in the past...so I decided today that it was time to look at the things that made me successful in the past and bring them back.
1. Tracking calories. First it was selfdietclub.com...then it was sparkpeople.com. I don't know what it is, but counting calories works for me. It's super time consuming and I would annoyingly track EVERYTHING that I put in my mouth, but it did work.
2. Planning my meals. I never stopped planning my meals...even over the past three months of eating out. I just didn't follow the meal plan. It ended up with lots of wasted food (and more money down the drain). I've gotten better at preparing meals on Sunday and packing lunch each day...I just need to get better at making dinner in the evening. That seems to be where I'm going wrong.
3. Exercise. This has been the thing that I have beat myself up most about. In the past three months, I have probably worked out maybe ten times. It makes me feel really bad...especially when I remember how good exercise makes me feel. A co-worker now goes to hot yoga all the time...without me. And one of my friends just started running and has been doing a whole bunch of 5Ks...without me. The co-workers that I used to work out with after school have started working out again...without me. I need to start moving. I've been making a workout schedule for the past couple of weeks...I just haven't been following it...kind of like the food thing. Anyway, I need to work out and I need to track my workouts.
4. Guidelines. I work better with guidelines. No whites...no caffeine...no desserts. I need guidelines to follow to keep me on track. Last Sunday, I told myself that I would eat none of the above things on Sundays through Thursdays...I had a drink in my hand and nachos in my belly by Wednesday night. This is week two of guidelines...actually, I guess I should just call it week one...
5. Weigh ins. I have a love/hate relationship with weigh ins. I'm a weekly weigh in girl...I like to see my progress on a graph or a chart. I like to see that what I have been doing shows on the scale. BUT with that said, that last weigh in REALLY got me off track...and it has been damn near impossible to get back on track again. I am still undecided about weigh ins...but I do know they have worked in the past.
6. All things blogs. That includes blogging and bloggers. I pretty much quit blogging and following all of my healthy living blogs cold turkey after that last weigh in. I would check in on a couple of my favorites every now and then, but for the most part, I didn't think there was any reason to read them because I wasn't living that life style. It just made me sad. Why do I want to read about someone running 5 miles after work while my fat ass is sitting on the couch. But as I've written before, I think that it is somewhat inspirational...it's the if "they" can do it I can do it kinda thing. I might do a little blog stalking this week to help get me motivated.
And that's about it. Those have been the six things that have helped me lose weight in the past. And honestly, in the past, it wasn't all about losing weight...it was about living healthy. Maybe that's where I've gone wrong. Since my focus has been on losing weight...I feel panicked and overwhelmed by it. As oppose to healthy living, that just something that is. You did it for yourself...for your body...for motivation...and for confidence (and so that you can fit into your clothes). So, with that being said, I've decided to leave out number 5...no weigh ins. Not weekly at least. I'll weigh myself tomorrow...and then I'll weigh myself again in a month.
Writing this has helped me feel a little motivated. It's cathartic in a way. Admitting my dirty little dining out secret...and realizing that stress has brought a lot of this on. AND realizing that I have only been off of the wagon for three months (Its felt like a lifetime). Anyway, I have felt like I have become closer to being back on track in the past couple of weeks. I need to remember that this whole thing is a process...
Welcome back to my calorie-counting, exercising, healthy living, blog following, meal planning, conscious living self...you've been missed:)
Friday, June 3, 2011
Goals for June
It's that time of the month to follow up on last months goals and make some new goals for this month.
MAY 2011 GOALS
1. Continue Couch to 10K--Yes and No. I got all the way to week 12 or so and I have kinda quit. I'm still working out (twice a day now)...and I've started yoga again. It's okay that I can't put a check by this one. I'm still proud of me.
2. Quit _______ (this one is serious!)--BIG NO FOR THIS ONE:(
3. Write chapter 3--BIG NO FOR THIS ONE TOO!!
4.Goal weight at the end of the month-125.0 lbs. Check...I haven't weighed myself since last Sunday, but as of last Sunday I weighed 124.2!!
5. Continue skin regimen--nope! (I'm sensing a pattern)
6. Continue vitamin regimen--nope!
7.Survive the last 17 days of school--Indeed...I DID survive the last 17 days!!
Okay...I should be pretty disappointed about last month's goals. Actually, I AM pretty disappointed by these goals. I was going to write a post the other day about how I NEVER finish what I start. I have big ideas...I set huge goals...I make long to do lists...and then I end the month with 2/7 things completed. It's frustrating...and it is a bad trait that I am not proud of. I always have such good intentions. Anyway, you know what they say...
If at first you don't succeed, yadda, yadda, yadda...
So, that is my motto...month after month. So here I go again for June...
JUNE 2011 GOALS
1. Hot yoga 2-3 times per week
2. Finish chapters 2 and 3 (This is non-negotiable...REALLY!!!)
3. Run/Walk 15-20 miles per week
And that's it. Maybe if I make a few less goals it will be easier to attain them...we'll see. *fingers crossed*
carla
MAY 2011 GOALS
1. Continue Couch to 10K--Yes and No. I got all the way to week 12 or so and I have kinda quit. I'm still working out (twice a day now)...and I've started yoga again. It's okay that I can't put a check by this one. I'm still proud of me.
2. Quit _______ (this one is serious!)--BIG NO FOR THIS ONE:(
3. Write chapter 3--BIG NO FOR THIS ONE TOO!!
4.
5. Continue skin regimen--nope! (I'm sensing a pattern)
6. Continue vitamin regimen--nope!
7.
Okay...I should be pretty disappointed about last month's goals. Actually, I AM pretty disappointed by these goals. I was going to write a post the other day about how I NEVER finish what I start. I have big ideas...I set huge goals...I make long to do lists...and then I end the month with 2/7 things completed. It's frustrating...and it is a bad trait that I am not proud of. I always have such good intentions. Anyway, you know what they say...
If at first you don't succeed, yadda, yadda, yadda...
So, that is my motto...month after month. So here I go again for June...
JUNE 2011 GOALS
1. Hot yoga 2-3 times per week
2. Finish chapters 2 and 3 (This is non-negotiable...REALLY!!!)
3. Run/Walk 15-20 miles per week
And that's it. Maybe if I make a few less goals it will be easier to attain them...we'll see. *fingers crossed*
carla
Friday, July 2, 2010
Goal Update
I was reviewing some of my former entries and I realized that I'm really good at setting goals...but not so good at keeping them. I saw things like yoga 2 or 3 times a week...no coffee...no "whites." A lot of stuff that I am clearly not following.
So, I decided that I needed to update my current goals...making my current food and workout routines more, as they say, transparent.
In terms of food, I'm following Geneen Roth's (Women, Food, and God) advice of not denying myself anything. If I feel like coffee...I'm gonna get some coffee. If I want some white potatoes...I'm gonna eat some white potatoes. I do believe that this is a healthier way to live and will hopefully keep me from binging on foods that I have denied myself in the past. I am NOT following Ms. Roth's eat without distractions advice. I tried, but I just can't. I enjoy eating in front of the television. Eating and watching TV is actually quality time that I get to spend with my fiance (and Michael Scott and Liz Lemon and Benson & Stabler). That approach might work for some...but it's not something that I'm putting on my goal list.
One bit of good advice that I heard the other day was regarding desserts. I don't know if I read it on a blog or in a magazine...or if I saw it on TV, but someone was saying if you eat dessert every day its no longer a treat. I liked that so I decided that desserts will be a special treat for me. And when I say desserts, I'm including things like Skinny Cow vanilla ice cream sandwiches and other low cal treats. I can treat myself once or twice a week, but that's it.
My biggest goals with food right now are continuing to practice portion control and eating when I am hungry. I still have difficulty leaving food on my plate, so I am trying to practice not putting as much food on my plate...and no seconds, of course. Does that make sense? I have been eating every four hours or so and all of my meals are around 300-400 calories. I eat a snack somewhere in there if I'm hungry. But since I haven't been burning as many calories during the day (compared to when I do when I am working), an afternoon snack isn't as dire. So, I do all that and I log my calories into selfdietclub.com and that is about it. Pretty simple and it seems to be working. On an average day, I eat no more than 1500 calories.
As far as exercising, I'm still doing JM's Shred. Yesterday was actually my last day of level one (WOOHOO!!...though I feel like I'm gonna miss it a bit). I am excited to see what level two has to offer, and I will hopefully find some time to write about it later. I'm happy with Shred...mixes up cardio, strength, and abs...makes me sweat like a pig every time...and it's only 20 min. Doesn't get any better than that!
I'm also still doing Couch to 10K...though I have brought it inside to the treadmill. I got tired of having to make sure that I woke up in time to beat the Georgia heat. So, I have been doing it after Shred, three days a week in the afternoons while watching BL. I actually almost gave up on C210K this week. When I ran last week, I ran sooooo hard that I thought that I was going to die. I was happy that I pushed myself, but I think that I pushed a little to hard...so hard that I didn't ever wanna do the program ever again. So, when I did it again on Wednesday, I didn't push too hard and jogged at a speed that I felt comfortable with...and I survived. I'm actually excited about doing it again today. (Excited is actually WAY too strong of a word...not dreading would be a better word to describe my feelings about running today.) One cool thing is that I am up to running 50% of the time...big accomplishment from day one when I was running for 30 second.
On the days that I don't do C210K, I walk on the treadmill for an hour. The walk is usually 3+ miles at 4 mph.
And that is it. That is my weekly schedule. Seven days a week. I have 20 more days of Shred and 8 1/2 more weeks of C210K. I will probably revamp my workout schedule after Shred. I really need some yoga in my life, and I think that is what I will incorporate after I finish.
Okay, I feel better now and I'm livin' a lil more authentically.
Monday, June 21, 2010
30 Day Shred
For the record, I L-O-V-E Jillian! She's my girl crush! I think that she has the most amazing body and she is, of course, is on my VERY, VERY favorite show in the world, the Biggest Loser!!!:) So, hopefully, she can keep me motivated. I like that you don't need much. Just a mat and some 3 lb weights...and, check, I've got both. I like that right now I have the time to do it. I mean, it's only 30 minutes...so there really is no excuse.
Oh! And I found this really cool blog written by a man and a woman that love the program. The woman (who is from Atlanta) runs 5K and 10Ks. She's a real inspiration.
Anyway, here's some rules that I MUST follow.
1) 30 Day Shred every day from 6/22-7/30.
2) No eating after 8:00 pm
3) Only drink water or green tea (and wine 1-2 times/week)
4) Track calories on selfdietclub.com (and try to stick to 1400-1500 calories/day)
Okay...that's it. Wish me luck!!!
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Couch to 10K-Week Two
I think the key is to just keep exercising. I can keep working on the food. If I get in the habit of exercising everything will balance out...and then eventually when I get the food part together, I will start to lose.
Well, I think that I will walk/run again tomorrow. I'm a couple of days off after taking a four day break from exercising. I even got the itchies again because of the long break. But they were not severe...and I pushed through. Great start to my day! Thanks Couch to 10K!!!
P.S. Once I get iTunes on my new computer...and update my phone, I will really be motivated. It definitely slows down your workout when Luther Vandross comes on in mid-run.
Monday, May 31, 2010
Couch to 10K
It was actually kind of fun. AND I got to catch up on my Biggest Loser episodes. I was walkin' and a runnin' and a cryin'. It was great!
It was actually so great that I've decided to do Couch to 5K every other day. So, I will do Couch to 10K on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays...and I will do Couch to 5K on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays. I hope that I'm not being overly ambitious. As I was running, the idea came to me. I think that it will be an awesome way to get my cardio in. If it becomes too much, I'll stop the Couch to 5K...but for now, IT'S ON!!! WOOHOO! DAY ONE!
Here's what the app looks like on my phone.
Saturday, May 29, 2010
The Day Before
So, I'm not really sure why I'm starting a blog. I'm hoping that it could possibly help me with this weight loss thing. You could say that I am trying to lose weight for my wedding in December. You could say that I am trying to lose so that my clothes will fit again...or you could say that I'm trying to lose because I don't want to end up being fat for the rest of my life.
But really, I honestly just want to be a healthy person. I want to be that girl that can leave food on her plate when she leaves the restaurant...or someone who eats fruit as a snack or loves vegetables...I want to be the girl who can pass on dessert...the girl who exercises daily and practices yoga regularly. I want to be someone that knows the best foods for my body...and make conscious decisions to only puts those foods in her mouth. I want to shop at Whole Foods, damnit!! I want to be "that girl."
So, what is stopping me? Well, let's see...I had Taco Bell last night (which is actually rare for me...I don't have a huge urge for fast food) It's usually Chinese and pizza that are my downfall. I recently found this great Thai place by my school and I am now addicted to Pad See U...which I have ordered three times in the past three weeks! I really enjoy eating...and I think that I have taken it on as part of my identity. I'm the girl who always makes jokes about being a good eater...or being a part of the "clean plate club." It's like the classic case of someone eating to fill a void. I might not be able to afford a cute dress or a new car, but I can afford sushi at Rusan's or nachos at Willy's...and I relish in the temporary happiness that it gives me.
Sometimes, I think that I just might be too lazy to be "that girl." Whenever I try, it lasts for about six months or so. It is usually six months of me being anally regimented about my diet and exercise. I journal what I eat...track my weight...exercise daily...read health blogs, health mags, and health books...until I don't anymore. Then I fall back into eating whatever I want and sleeping in instead of working out. It is all or nothing with me. I'm frustrated and I'm starting to feel like I am doomed to yo-yo like this for the rest of my life. I am the "thick" girl who knows how to lose weight but just can't seem to maintain it.
So, I have decided to start a blog. Nothing else has helped...so, why not? I don't think that I expect that people will read it. I just need an outlet...something to keep me accountable. I will be starting tomorrow (hence the title "The Day Before")...and yes, I will be eating any and everything that I want today. I know this is not what I am supposed to do...but hey, CLEARLY I am not perfect. So, one last day of yumminess.
I have set the following goals for the next two weeks:
But really, I honestly just want to be a healthy person. I want to be that girl that can leave food on her plate when she leaves the restaurant...or someone who eats fruit as a snack or loves vegetables...I want to be the girl who can pass on dessert...the girl who exercises daily and practices yoga regularly. I want to be someone that knows the best foods for my body...and make conscious decisions to only puts those foods in her mouth. I want to shop at Whole Foods, damnit!! I want to be "that girl."
So, what is stopping me? Well, let's see...I had Taco Bell last night (which is actually rare for me...I don't have a huge urge for fast food) It's usually Chinese and pizza that are my downfall. I recently found this great Thai place by my school and I am now addicted to Pad See U...which I have ordered three times in the past three weeks! I really enjoy eating...and I think that I have taken it on as part of my identity. I'm the girl who always makes jokes about being a good eater...or being a part of the "clean plate club." It's like the classic case of someone eating to fill a void. I might not be able to afford a cute dress or a new car, but I can afford sushi at Rusan's or nachos at Willy's...and I relish in the temporary happiness that it gives me.
Sometimes, I think that I just might be too lazy to be "that girl." Whenever I try, it lasts for about six months or so. It is usually six months of me being anally regimented about my diet and exercise. I journal what I eat...track my weight...exercise daily...read health blogs, health mags, and health books...until I don't anymore. Then I fall back into eating whatever I want and sleeping in instead of working out. It is all or nothing with me. I'm frustrated and I'm starting to feel like I am doomed to yo-yo like this for the rest of my life. I am the "thick" girl who knows how to lose weight but just can't seem to maintain it.
So, I have decided to start a blog. Nothing else has helped...so, why not? I don't think that I expect that people will read it. I just need an outlet...something to keep me accountable. I will be starting tomorrow (hence the title "The Day Before")...and yes, I will be eating any and everything that I want today. I know this is not what I am supposed to do...but hey, CLEARLY I am not perfect. So, one last day of yumminess.
I have set the following goals for the next two weeks:
- no more white foods (flour, sugar, potatoes, rice, pasta, etc.)
- no fried foods
- no desserts
- no coffee
- take multivitamin daily
- drink 110 oz. of water daily
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